I recently got engaged, so I definitely get the feeling of overwhelmingness when everyone walks up two minutes in and starts asking: When are you getting married? Where are you getting married? What are you going to wear?
All these questions pile up with the ones in your head and can often even keep you from enjoying the moment, as well as distracting you from what’s truly important: the decision to spend your life with the one you love most!
First of all, after you get engaged, take a week or two to enjoy the moment. Let it all sink in and give yourself and your partner some time to relax, without thinking about the actual wedding right away. When all these questions start popping up, just say “I don’t know!”. And it’s okay for you to not know all the answers.
Once you’ve had some time to enjoy the engagement, talk with your fiancé and start dreaming together. I started building a pinterest board of all the inspo behind my dream wedding and shared it with my boyfriend.
Think about what matters most to both of you; is there is a place that is special to you as a couple? Have any of you had a vision of how you’ve wanted that place or that wedding to look like? Do you want a big wedding or a small wedding? Do you want something fancy or are you definitely more the casual type? For me, the most important thing is that you and your partner are on the same page and make agreements!
After you’ve had the time to paint the bigger picture, then you can start digging into other very important details, like, for example: the budget.
Whether it’s you who is covering the wedding, or you’re lucky enough to have some additional support, it’s a conversation that will help you organize your ideas, and it may answer many questions for you to have a guide on where to begin looking for wedding venues, guest list, wedding dress, etc.
Although at first it might be a conversation you don’t necessarily enjoy, it’s definitely a must, and again, it’s of course key that you’re all on board with the same picture.
Set the date
Now, time to narrow down a date. When you start thinking of a date, especially if, unlike us, you don’t live in a tropical country where it’s basically sunny all year-round, you have to consider the seasons.
For example, if you’re thinking about an outdoor wedding, you need to make sure it’s not during the rainy season. In our case, and even though we do live in the tropics and were set in an indoor wedding, we couldn’t risk rain, so this helped us narrow down some dates.
Also, depending on the budget, there are seasons where the venues are more expensive, so make sure to do a quick benchmark on fees and overall spikes on rentals. If you have the chance, take your time to get married, enjoy being engaged and do everything you can to make your wedding planning an enjoyable process, not a headache, a race, or a competition.
This will also increase your chances of getting married where you always dreamed of.
Now it’s time to choose the wedding venue. In my personal experience, we always knew. Because it was a special place for us as a couple. It was why we met and the place to which we constantly traveled. It can also be a place you have never been to, and maybe always wanted to go as a couple.
The answer to this destination question will answer many others, for example: How many guests can you have? Where is it located? Is it in fact available? Now that you know what your budget is, you can start figuring out if your chosen venue has all your needs and wants.
Create a Pinterest board
And now, let the inspiration flow! I recommend starting a Pinterest board. Envision how you would like your wedding to be, how you would like your dress to be, browse for flower arrangements, doodle away some ceremony decoration, take street shots of table decoration etc.
Be open and aware of anything that might spike your interest. This keeps things fresh and interesting. Nothing is set in stone, and if you’re open to new ideas and are clear on your personality as a couple, you’ll know what you like the most, and what you definitely don’t like.
Once you have created the board, take time to sit down with your partner and exchange opinions and ideas, maybe over some wine or in our case, a few shots of aguardiente! Let the games begin!